Now that all the 26 finalists are determined, I would need to revise my predictions very slightly as one of those I predicted to land in the Top 10 has been eliminated. There is one significant rising star that I observed after watching both semifinal performances, and some notes on a few entries. So here goes:
ROMANIA: “Zaleilah” – Mandinga. Everything about the semifinal performance just went wonderfully well for this entry, as all elements fell into their proper places. As expected Elena Ionescu’s sexiness is well showcased in her very short red minidress (showcasing her lissome long legs)–notice how the top looked like an apron? And she was able to employ good breath control as she indeed sounded as lilting as the recording. I first was worried about its Top 10 prospects, but judging from this performance this is a shoo-in and a serious contender to equal or exceed this country’s best finish in 3rd place (in 2005 and 2010).
MOLDOVA: “Lautar” – Pasha Parfeny. I forgot to note about Pasha’s resemblance to actor Colin Farrell, though replace Colin’s sex appeal with vocal and musical talent, and put him with five barefoot dancing girls like in this presentation, and we have a very engaging PG-rated party romp (if you put the girls with the real Colin Farrell, this would easily turn into X-rated territory). I love this performance that I think this could become a contender for a Top 10 finish. It’s the last number to perform at the finals.
CYPRUS: “La La Love” – Ivi Adamou. Yes, I’m glad she made the finals, but my goodness, her vocals are so pitchy! I cannot treat her as a Top 10 contender anymore…
UKRAINE: “Be My Guest” – Gaitana. There are fans who are impressed with the performance, but as much as I love this, I felt Gaitana sounded winded. She needs to learn to employ effective breath control for the finals so she can deliver the magic and perhaps she’ll then be in contention to equal Ani Lorak and Ruslana’s successful showing.
SLOVENIA: “Verjamem” – Eva Boto. It’s sad that when it counted, the vocals sounded pitchy. This is the factor why this entry failed to qualify for the finals.
TURKEY: “Love Me Back” – Can Bonomo. I forgot to consider that Germany was voting for the second semifinals, and the expected douze points that were typically given to Turkey by that country was perhaps the factor that allowed this entry to advance into the finals, along with an admittedly entertaining production featuring five male backup dancers forming into a boat at one point in the number. I still don’t like this song.
BOSNIA & HERZEGOVINA: “Korake Ti Znam” – Maya Sar. I suppose her two previous appearances to this contest as a backup performer helped her deliver a confident, polished, and professional performance when it was her turn in the spotlight. With Slovenia falling this ballad became the one that would accompany the formidable Serbia as the “other quality Balkan ballad” into the finals.
Here is my revised forecast:
ICELAND, GREECE, ROMANIA, DENMARK, SERBIA, MOLDOVA, SWEDEN, ITALY, SPAIN, GERMANY
BUBBLING UNDER: RUSSIA, HUNGARY, UKRAINE, BOSNIA & HERZEGOVINA, NORWAY, UNITED KINGDOM, AZERBAIJAN
Like millions of Filipinos, last Thursday morning I was glued to the TV screen awaiting with hope for the victory of Jessica Sanchez in American Idol. Well, unfortunately we didn’t get the victory we hoped for, but we had the consolation witnessing that the finale is practically a Jessica Sanchez show, as she performed four numbers during the finale–the Chaka Khan medley with the other Top 12 girls, her solo number for “I Will Always Love You”, her final duet with Phillip Phillips to Jennifer Warnes and Joe Cocker’s 1982 smash “Up Where We Belong”, and of course the now-immortal duet with original Dreamgirls star Jennifer Holliday to “And I Am Telling You (I’m Not Going)”. There could have been a fifth number, as the Top 12 girls were supposed to also do a Donna Summer medley, featuring a climax of Jessica dueting with Kristen Chenoweth on the famous Donna-Barbra Streisand duet “No More Tears (Enough is Enough)”, but that was scrapped for time constraints.
A piquant note about that epic duet: doesn’t Jennifer Holliday look like Today Show host Hoda Kotb? Albeit Jennifer has admittedly more frighteningly freakish expressions than Hoda.
Hoda Kotb (Source: Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images North America)
In some ways, it’s also third placer Joshua Ledet’s show, as he also performed five times: the opening number to Bruno Mars’ “Runaway Baby” with the rest of the Top 12 (sans Jessica and Phillip–note: Joshua performed this song earlier in the competition), a duet with Fantasia on Elton John’s “Take Me to the Pilot”, a hilarious pre-taped number with the Top 12 (again sans Phillip and Jessica) singing a “phonebook song” and two Top 12 boys’ (sans Phillip in both) performances with a Neil Diamond medley and a Robin Gibb medley.
It was fun seeing Joshua dueting with Fantasia (It’s the Fantasia-Mantasia showdown!), though it is both a hot mess and a lively spiritual experience as they gave a session in major holleration (though it was abruptly cut off in the broadcast). Fantasia looked strikingly different with a long straight weave and sporting that sequined black jumpsuit. Unfortunately, Fantasia should fire the stylist who suggested she wore such outfit as this outfit is simply so unflattering to her figure–I had visions of Paula Abdul’s 1991 MTV Music Awards performance to “Vibeology”, where she sported an unforgiving and unflattering sequined leotard wherein the media then viciously compared her to Miss Piggy.
Reflecting on Jessica’s duet with Jennifer Holliday and Joshua’s duet with Fantasia, I noticed some eery parallelisms especially when I remembered Loretta Devine was Jennifer’s Dreamgirls colleague, and Jennifer Hudson (who won an Oscar playing Jennifer Holliday’s role in the movie version of that musical) was in Fantasia’s season of American Idol. During their stint in the musical, Loretta Devine was slim, and Jennifer Holliday was the heavy one. In Season 3 of American Idol, Fantasia was slimmer than Jennifer Hudson.
THEN: Jennifer Holliday, Sheryl Lee Ralph, and Loretta Devine in Dreamgirls (image captured from latimes.com)
THEN: Fantasia Barrino, LaToya London, and Jennifer Hudson with Ryan Seacrest during the controversial “bottom three” moment in American Idol Season 3 (Source: Ray Mickshaw/Wireimage)
Now, thanks to life-saving gastic bypass surgery in the 1990s, Jennifer Holliday slimmed down (and unlike Carnie Wilson, managed to remain in a slimmer, healthier frame). Loretta Devine meanwhile became heavier but still remains a well-regarded active actress with guest appearances and supporting roles in various movies and TV dramas. Jennifer Hudson has Weight Watchers to thank for her now slimmed down frame, while we saw how Fantasia looks now…
NOW: Loretta Devine, Jennifer Holliday, and Sheryl Lee Ralph (image sourced from singersroom.com)
NOW: Jennifer Hudson performing during an American Idol results show (image sourced from bumpshack.com)
NOW: Fantasia at the American Idol Season 11 finale (Source: Getty Images)
I also have to note that after Jessica performed that intense duet with Jennifer Holliday, she followed it up with the tender “Up Where We Belong” with eventual champion Phillip Phillps. It’s such a sharp contrast as Jessica growled and hollered epically with Jennifer Holliday, then she showcased that sweet and tender high register in her voice in this latter duet–such amazing range Jessica has, no?
Finally, I just want to close my essay with my favorite highlight from the Idol finale, the aforementioned “Phonebook Song”. Deandre Brackensick’s falsetto, Joshua’s holleration and the reaction from the lower-ranked finalists (and musical arranger Michael Orland) cracks me up every time (I’ll try to find a better resolution copy when it’s available).
Collectively, the group of 4th placers is actually stronger than this group even if it featured three of the best vocalists ever to grace the American Idol stage. There is a mix of middling contenders who outlived their welcome, some stalwart survivors who saw action in the dreaded bottom three several times on their way to this placement, a well acclaimed underdog, and two front-runners who fans perceived was unjustly eliminated at this stage (in other words, should’ve seen action in the finale).
I will highlight five 3rd placers on this list. So here are the ones who ranked from 6th to 10th place in my list:
Cinq (5) pwah(n)t – Syesha Mercado (Season 7)
Quartre (4) pwah(n)t – Danny Gokey (Season 8)
Trois (3) pwah(n)t – Vonzell Solomon (Season 4)
Deux (2) pwah(n)t – Jasmine Trias (Season 3)
Un (1) pwah(n)t – Casey James (Season 9)
I know there are detractors out there who would’ve placed Danny Gokey at the bottom of the heap especially with that notorious rendition of Aerosmith’s “Dream On” and the way he pimped his dead wife especially during the early part of his Idol journey, but we have to consider that aside from that horrible performance, he was an otherwise strong vocalist.
Six (6) Pwah(n)t – Kimberley Locke (Season 2). This big-voiced diva so intimidated the other female contestants that no one with the exception of Frenchie Davis would be willing to be grouped with her during Hollywood group round. Well, I suppose their fears were justified as Kimberley and Frenchie gave a legendary performance of Freda Payne’s “Band of Gold”. Her Idol journey through the finals was rather bumpy just like Syesha Mercado and Hailey Reinhart, figuring in the Bottom 3 four times. Well, anyway, at least she finished this high and eventually went on to a sustainable career, with a bunch of chart hits on the adult contemporary and dance charts. Besides the aforementioned “Band of Gold”, I’ll also highlight her performances of Judy Garland’s “Somewhere Over the Rainbow” and Billy Joel’s “New York State of Mind”.
Sept (7) Pwah(n)t – Haley Reinhart (Season 10). This bluesy growler was not expected to last that long–she managed to get enough votes to make the finals, but the first few weeks she didn’t make a striking, memorable impression, and only managed to survive by the skin of her teeth. Everything changed during the second Top 11 week, with a scintillatingly sexy and bluesy rendition of Elton John’s “Bennie and the Jets”. Though she still had some missteps along the way after that, she then arguably gave her season its best highlights (unlike the Top Two, who simply coasted along with their fanbases without providing any memorable performances). I had to highlight four instead of the usual three: besides “Bennie and the Jets”, there’s also the Animals’ “House of the Rising Sun”, Ben E. King’s “I (Who Have Nothing)” and Led Zeppelin’s “What Is and What Should Never Be” (the last featuring a literal trip and fall, though Haley recovered quickly).
The top three in this round are arguably among the best vocalists ever to grace the American Idol stage. The points scored do not reflect the caliber of their talent or how close they are level-wise–in many ways ranking these three incredible singers is a matter of splitting hairs.
Huit (8) Pwah(n)t – Elliott Yamin (Season 5). When I saw his name amongst the ones who made the Top 24 in his season, I was thinking he would be like cannon fodder. It didn’t help that his looks in the early stages (especially his audition and Hollywood week) lacks any kind of charisma. But his voice has proven to be the ticket for him to win the audiences over that as the weeks wore on he turned into an underdog who is capable of usurping the front-runners. It also helped that from that unfortunate crew cut he grew his hair out that he looked close-to-handsome at the end of his Idol journey. In terms of record sales, he eventually became the second-biggest selling artist from his season behind Daughtry, and had a big Top 20 hit with “Wait For You”. The three main highlights from a great body of work include Leon Russell’s “A Song For You” (which Simon Cowell labeled a “vocal masterclass” and reduced Paula Abdul to a weeping mess), his semifinal performance of “Moody’s Mood for Love”, and his take on Elvis Presley’s “If I Can Dream”.
Dix (10) Pwah(n)t – Melinda Doolittle (Season 6). Until the outcome of this season’s Top Three results, this lady ruled the roost amongst the third placers. For consistency, it is hard to find anyone whose body of work are universally of a high caliber as hers–she was never in danger of being eliminated until she was shockingly booted out at Top Three. It was supposed to be a showdown between her and Jordin Sparks, so in some ways as much as I saluted Blake Lewis’s innovations, I resented him for blocking Melinda’s destiny in the finale. Anyway, though she doesn’t sell as many records as Elliott Yamin, she still remains in extremely high regard, and I just simply adore her commentary and insights on Michael Slezak’s Idology on TVLine.com. Three standout performances from a universally excellent body of work are the Great American Songbook standard “My Funny Valentine” (originated by Mitzi Green), the bluesy “I’m A Woman” (originated by Christine Kittrell, popularized by Peggy Lee), and “taking it to church” with Bon Jovi’s “Have a Nice Day”.
Douze (12) Pwah(n)t – Joshua Ledet (Season 11). I’m reluctant to remove Melinda from her top perch to pave the way for this guy, but even Melinda herself was more than willing to relinquish it as she’s a huge fan of him–just watch the viral video of her watching his performance of “When A Man Loves A Woman”. He got a reputation of being a “standing ovation generator” with the 15 or so ovations he received from the judges for his live performances, and with his intense gospel-based singing style early on he was compared to Season 3 champion Fantasia Barrino, and was given the nickname “Mantasia”. And the judges could not help but speak hyperboles after almost every performance of his, with J. Lo even declaring that he’s one of the best singers of the past 50 years. Is he deserving of such hype? I think he did earn at least half of those standing ovations, and he was really effective in channeling those soul legends of yore–vocally he is indeed up there with the likes of Sam Cooke, Otis Redding, and Jackie Wilson. But I think all those hyperboles given by the judges was the factor that led to Joshua’s premature boot. As much as Melinda gave a more consistent body of work than this fellow, this guy indeed generated some intense, genuinely soul-stirring performances, with four of them (which I shall highlight below) belonging among the best performances of all time on American Idol. Besides the aforementioned “When A Man Loves A Woman”, other major moments from this guy include James Brown’s “It’s A Man’s, Man’s, Man’s World”, Mary J. Blige’s “No More Drama”, and to counteract criticism that all he does is scream and holler, his delicate take on India.Arie’s “Ready for Love”.
Garnering the dreaded nul (0) pwah(n)t? Season 1′s Nikki McKibbin (I still could not forgive her for outlasting Tamyra!).
Joshua made Season 11 continue to pull further up front of the pack. But let’s see how the other seasons stack up:
1. Season 11 – 72 points
2. Season 5 – 62 points
3. Season 10 – 58 points
4. Season 7 – 50 points
5. Season 4 – 43 points
6 (TIE). Season 3 – 40 points
6 (TIE). Season 8 – 40 points
8. Season 6 – 31 points
9. Season 1 – 24 points
10. Season 9 – 23 points
11. Season 2 – 21 points
The American Idol season finale is upon us. How would this year’s Final 2 stack up against all other seasons? We’ll find out after the final results are announced.
Now let’s discuss the automatic finalists. As per current Eurovision rules, the country that wins the previous year’s Eurovision contest gets an automatic finalist slot along with the five largest contributing countries to the European Broadcasting Union (EBU), dubbed the “Big Five”: France, Germany, Italy, Spain, and the United Kingdom. Until the return of jury voting for the finals in 2009, the “Big Five” tend to languish in the lower rungs of the rankings, but since 2009, we get to see them roaring back to prominence again, with Germany winning in 2010 and witnessing at least two of them figuring in the Top 10 in 2009 and 2011. At least three of this year’s “Big Five” entries seemed poised to figure in the Top 10 this year. Let’s evaluate their prospects, starting with…
UNITED KINGDOM: ”Love Will Set You Free” – Engelbert Humperdinck. The people at the BBC responsible for fielding entries to this contest must have been brainstorming about ways for them to rise above the doldrums they experienced in recent years, especially with the onslaught of bloc voting amongst the Eastern European countries. So they realized they need an act that has a significant audience in Eastern Europe and came to the conclusion that veteran singer Engelbert Humperdinck still packs houses in those territories so they logically thought he can bring forth those much needed points for them to figure in the Top 10 like in their heydays from the 1960s-1990s. Yes, he’s 76 years old, but he still can carry a tune very well and sings his hits close to the way he sang them in his 1960s-1970s prime. But in my opinion, he would need the right kind of song to make the maximum impact.
Were the songwriters able to give Engelbert the perfect song to bring the UK back on top? To be blunt, the short answer is no. Ballads being offered by Iceland, Serbia, Slovenia, and Spain are way more compelling than this entry. And this entry has the disadvantage having to perform first in the finals. But it doesn’t mean that this entry lacks merits–this Western-style acoustic waltz ballad sounds like what if Engelbert contributed a love ballad to the soundtrack of a 1960s “Spaghetti Western”. It evokes one of his biggest international hits, “The Last Waltz”, filtered through a starker, more mature perspective a la Johnny Cash’s final recordings (think his cover of Nine Inch Nails’ “Hurt”). As competently and maturely as Engelbert sang it, he lacked the haunting gravitas that the late Johnny Cash evoked in his final days and I presume that’s what the songwriters intended the song to sound like. In relation to Johnny Cash, Engelbert still sounded like a spry young teenage whippersnapper. But it’s still a dignified and admirable effort, and I hope the juries all over rally around this, and it would be achievement enough in my opinion if in the final standings he prevails in his geriatric showdown against the Buranovo Grannies.
FRANCE: ”Echo (You and I)” – Anggun. I was so excited when I learned this Indonesian-born singer would be representing France, as I was captivated with her spellbinding 1998 international hit “Snow on the Sahara”. But then I listened to this dance ditty and as much as I’m still a big Anggun fan, I’m just so disappointed with this entry. The jarring hip-hop-styled intro does not make any sense in context to the rest of the song, for starters, and despite the placement of some contemporary bleeps and bloops, the melody still sounded like a quaint 1980s dance tune. Some fans compared the song to the works of David Guetta, but I’ve listened to several of his recordings and they do not sound anything like this number (the closest thing to a David Guetta song in this year’s Eurovision is the entry from Ukraine).
The music video similarly doesn’t make any coherent sense, either (but then again, sometimes they are not supposed to)–what does the song have to do with hunky guys training in the military and what the hell is Anggun doing amidst these hunks, slinking about in a black vest and bikini-bottom combo and cape (designed by Jean-Paul Gaultier, so she’ll likely wear that outfit for the finals)? With some homoerotic gas-mask scenes, I don’t think Anggun’s seduction seemed to work if she’s supposed to act as a tempting seductress to these men. I suppose it would only make sense if we view the video as an editorial commercial for some of Jean-Paul Gaultier’s products, perhaps (though which of them, I wonder; does he make military uniforms?). I suppose it will be consolation enough that she’ll be treating us to some male eye candy as she has three hunky athletic male backup dancers for her Eurovision performance. Amongst the “Big Five” entries this year, this looks like the weakest link, in my opinion, though (sorry, Anggun).
ITALY: “L’Amore e femmina [Love is female](Out of Love)” – Nina Zilli. After a lengthy 14-year absence, Italy returned to this contest last year in a major way, placing second with the retro-styled jazz-pop number “Madness of Love”. It is likely Italy will still secure a Top 10 finish at least with this entry. Originally at the Sanremo Song Festival (which served as the contest where they select the Eurovision representative, though it is not necessarily the case that the overall winner of this festival would be the Eurovision contestant), Nina sang a ballad entitled “Per Sempre”. Her physical and vocal resemblance to the late Amy Winehouse was already evident even in this lush orchestral ballad, and Eurovision fans felt Italy’s placement in the Top 10 is secure. But then, it was announced that instead of that ballad, the upbeat retro-styled ditty “L’Amore e femmina” would be the song instead. This song does make Nina’s inherent Amy Winehouse-ness even more apparent. There are some fans who felt RAI made a mistake with this decision, but I actually like this number–my only quibble is that they chose to make it bilingual in English and Italian, as I felt the all-Italian version is better and sassier. Still, I’m optimistic that this will still figure in the Top 10 in the finals.
A quibble in their Eurovision finals presentation, though, after viewing their rehearsal–I’ve noticed her back-up singers feature two ladies and a tall, dreadlocked, mulatto male; as much as he’s appealingly good-looking, I felt it would’ve made more sense if the back-up singers are all female.
AZERBAIJAN: ”When the Music Dies” – Sabina Babayeva. Sure, the press write-ups hype up the fact that they employed traditional Azerbaijani instruments in the recording of this song. But it still does not detract the fact that this waltzing soulful ballad is derived from Alicia Keys’ major hit, “Fallin’”, which was in turn derived from James Brown’s classic “It’s A Man’s Man’s Man’s World”. So far this country consistently figures in the Top 10 during the Eurovision finals since joining in 2008, winning last year for “Running Scared“. Some Eurovision fans and pundits felt that this time they will break their Top 10 streak this time, but I wouldn’t count this number out yet, as it’s still a solid, worthwhile number, even if it’s derivative.
SPAIN: ”Quédate conmigo [Stay with me]” – Pastora Soler. Since 2005, Spain has either been languishing in the bottom, or squeaking out a middling showing at best (its best placement was “Algo Pequeñito” in 15th place back in 2010, which benefited a little bit by sympathy votes over the fact that it was gatecrashed by the notorious pitch invader Jimmy Jump, who famously crashed various sports events). If we were to judge based on buzz by various Eurovision fans, Spain’s fortunes would change for the better this time with this entry, a dramatic pop ballad featuring soulful, passionate singing. I do hope that this will indeed figure in the Top 10, but it is indeed extremely competitive this year with other striking ballads and fierce dance tracks. It is indeed Spain’s best entry to this contest in recent years.
GERMANY: ”Standing Still” – Roman Lob. Running second after Denmark’s entry as the best-crafted pop song in my opinion is this entry, a lovely, earnest, midtempo pop number. It’s style is contemporary, its production values crisp, and the singing strong. Arguably, this is better than Lena’s entry last year, at the very least. By musical merit, it does deserve to sustain Lena’s two successful forays in this contest.
Now all entries are accounted for, let me showcase my “fearful” forecast on who’ll figure in the Top 10 in the finals:
BUBBLING UNDER: RUSSIA, CYPRUS, HUNGARY, UKRAINE, NORWAY, UNITED KINGDOM, AZERBAIJAN
My Top 10 personal favorites this year seem to coincide with the ones I forecast would make the Top 10. So the list below would feature some additional sentimental favorite choices of mine:
FINLAND, HUNGARY, CYPRUS, IRELAND, MALTA, BELARUS, UKRAINE, NORWAY, UNITED KINGDOM
A special dubious mention to AUSTRIA, as its catchy chorus is now currently embedded in my head like a lingering virus. It’s not really quite a guilty pleasure like ROMANIA, but qualifies as “guilty”.
It’s such a competitive group of entries this year, in my opinion. Though fans and pundits are currently betting SWEDEN to dominate, I think we should not count the chickens until they’re hatched–SERBIA and ICELAND can conceivably pull off an upset, in my opinion.
The second half of the second semifinal features an eclectic mix of ballads, dance tracks, an ethno-pop ditty, and a soaring hard-rock number. Though this group contains the one many fans perceive as the front-runner to win it all, the other entries are relatively weak. Let’s proceed with…
CROATIA: “Nebo [Heaven]” – Nina Badrić. To compensate for the lack of male eye candy in this year’s contest, Nina provided a whole bunch of them in billowing white loincloths in her music video. Too bad we won’t see them when she performs her song live in this contest. Considering the strong ballads fielded by Serbia and Slovenia, it’s going to be an uphill battle for this entry to rank high, but it might benefit from the strong Balkan bloc present in this group to advance to the finals. Another thing to watch out for is if she’ll be able to manage to stay on pitch when she sings, as she sounded pitchy during the first rehearsal.
SWEDEN: “Euphoria” – Loreen. This singer also has an Idol connection–she competed in Swedish Idol eight years ago, placing fourth. She physically reminds me of “You Oughta Know”-era Alanis Morrissette, with stage presence a la Kate Bush if she does martial arts moves instead of her legendarily quirky interpretative dancing. Fans and pundits have rated this the one to beat, and based on polls by various Eurovision clubs, it might even dominate the finals the way back in 2009 Norway’s Alexander Rybak won with “Fairytale”. Perhaps she will get the public support, but will the juries support a modern techno number like this one?
Based from indications on the first rehearsal, Loreen is likely to simply duplicate the presentation she did at Melodifestivalen (the Swedish national final). I wish she would jazz it up a bit–I have an idea based on her martial arts moves that she can go full throttle and get a harness and fly across the stage, a la Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. Wouldn’t that be cool? It would also be perfect for the song title and theme as the feeling of euphoria is often also associated with a perception of flight (think Peter Pan’s “think happy thoughts“). Perhaps that was junked as a harness may not be feasible for the venue.
GEORGIA: “I’m A Joker” – Anri Jokhadze. Besides the entries of Montenegro and San Marino, typically figuring at the bottom of the heap amongst Eurovision fans is this entry. It’s basically a campy dance song sung by a 3rd-rate Rick Astley impersonator to my ears. Sure they are jazzing up the stage presentation and they rearranged the song with a mock operatic intro, and more dynamic and dramatic instrumentation with some ethno-pop elements thrown in but it still would not save the inherent dreckitude of this song. It might garner points from former Soviet colleagues from Belarus and Ukraine, but I have this feeling this entry will have the dubious distinction of being the first participating entry from this country to miss the finals since beginning its participation in 2007.
TURKEY: “Love Me Back” – Can Bonomo. Turkish language lesson: “C” is pronounced like the English “J”, so his first name sounds like “John”. Sure it’s a lively ethno-pop ditty, but it’s just too quaint and silly to my ears. Worse, I found the guy’s singing to be pitchy. I have a feeling this country will miss the finals for a second year in a row. Turkey has fielded way better entries than this in recent years… what the hell happened?
ESTONIA: “Kuula [Listen]” – Ott Lepland. This is actually a quality ballad with a quality singer–too bad it is overshadowed by the awesomeness of the Serbian and Slovenian entries, and I’m not certain the Balkan bloc would be rallying behind this one. He’s also the product of the Idol machine, as he won the third season of his country’s version of this juggernaut.
SLOVAKIA: “Don’t Close Your Eyes” – Max Jason Mai. For viewers needing a hard rock fix, it is provided by this entry. This might be this country’s best bet to finally see action in the finals ever since it returned to the fold in 2009, as everything about this entry is strong, from the production, music, singing, and even visual appeal. Can it do a “Hard Rock Hallelujah”? Perhaps not, but breaking through to the finals would be a major achievement enough.
NORWAY: “Stay” – Tooji. This and Sweden’s entry share a lot of things in common–both entries are in the techno-dance genre, sung by singers of Middle Eastern / North African descent (Loreen is half-Moroccan, Tooji is Persian). It’s also receiving positive buzz amongst Eurovision fans–but will it get points from the Balkan bloc to advance into the finals? It could, as there are some ethnic flourishes underneath the modern techno rhythms.
BOSNIA & HERZEGOVINA: “Korake ti znam [I know your steps]” – Maya Sar. Another ballad from the Balkan contingent, and it’s a solid orchestral pop piece. I’m certain the Balkan Bloc will rally behind this and this will advance into the finals. But it is unlikely to outshine Serbia and Slovenia. This lady already saw action in this contest previously, as a backup musician or vocalist back in 2004 and last year.
LITHUANIA: “Love is Blind” – Donny Montell. This is a half-ballad, half-dance track, with the catchy dance groove only entering after halfway into the song. The good things going for it are the following: the song has a decent-enough groove and melody; Donny will offer a couple of gimmicks for the show, with the ballad part featuring him blindfolded while singing, then he would perform a one-armed cartwheel in between singing his lines during the dance portion of the song; and Donny is a strong singer, managing to be able to stay on-key live. Though his talents are undeniable, my issue is that he simply lacks charisma and star quality, and well, there is the obvious diction issue. Still, there is more than an even chance for this number to make the finals.
Now that the second semifinal is accounted for, here’s which countries I think will advance into the finals:
The second semifinal seems to be loaded with entries from the Balkan Bloc, with five of the former constituents of Yugoslavia in this group along with Bulgaria. So much for placing them in “pots” to minimize the impact of bloc voting. Anyway, let’s examine the first half of this group, starting with:
SERBIA: “Nije ljubav stvar [Love is not an object]” – Željko Joksimović. The English version of this song is entitled “Synonym“, but it’s a good thing it was decided Željko will perform in his native tongue instead, as the English lyrics underwhelm and not really a good fit to the dramatic music. This guy already had a successful run at this contest, placing 2nd eight years ago behind Ukraine’s Ruslana’s “Wild Dances” (there is another Ruslana reference later in this article). There are some melodic elements in this ballad that borrowed from Coldplay’s hit “Paradise”, but not enough that it qualifies as plagiarism. This dramatic folk-pop ballad has the qualities that could help Željko duplicate or even exceed his previous successful showing.
FYR MACEDONIA: “Crno i belo [Black and White]” – Kaliopi.Kaliopi is a veteran female rocker with a raspy, Melissa Etheridge quality to her voice. I’m not crazy about this rock song (for the Balkan entries this year, their best bets are the ballads), but I have a feeling the Balkan vote will help shore up her fortunes and this might see action in the finals.
NETHERLANDS: “You and Me” – Joan Franka. Joan’s voice has an Adele-like quality to it, but as sweet as the melody of this acoustic ditty, it sounded like Adele singing an old-fashioned silly nursery rhyme. I wonder how large is Cher’s fanbase as Joan Franka’s Native American costume (because the song talks about loving a childhood friend she used to play “Cowboys and Indians” with) and dusky, almost exotic facial features makes people recall Cher’s 1973 hit “Half-Breed”. There are fans who like this ditty, but I have a gnawing feeling this country will miss the finals yet again–unless the Cher fans throughout Europe (plus if there are any such fans in the juries) would rally around her and vote.
MALTA: “This is the Night” – Kurt Calleja. This fellow resembles Friends star David Schwimmer. At first listen over two months ago, I wasn’t totally into this synth pop dance ditty and found it unremarkable. But they beefed it up a bit with rock guitars and this number actually came to life for me and it grew on me–yes, the “eh-eh, eh-eh-yeh” chorus is as catchy as you can find in a Lady Gaga song. I think it has more than an even chance of qualifying for the finals.
BELARUS: “We are the Heroes” – Litesound. The version that was originally performed during the national finals had a rock arrangement with an opening synth groove that sounded exactly like the opening to Kelly Clarkson’s smash “Stronger (What Doesn’t Kill You)”. They then hired a Greek producer and had the song rearranged, removing the original intro and replaced it with a sleek ballad intro effect before seguing into a more pop-dance groove (instead of a rock-dance groove). Some fans have felt the new arrangement ruined the song, but I actually liked the new arrangement, too–for me it sounded more like a Swedish-produced pop song, which is actually a good thing. Besides the quality of the song, also likely to boost this entry’s prospects of landing in the finals are the handsome appeal of the band members, especially the lead singer (well, they are described as a boy band even if they play instruments).
The raspy delivery of the lead singer made me think of another American Idol besides Kelly Clarkson–it made me imagine Season 7 champion David Cook singing this number and making a big hit out of it. I have a feeling he can even improve on it as he is a native English speaker so there would be no diction issues, and maybe he can also do some of his inventive rearrangements like he did during his Idol stint. Sure, the lyrics may be a bit beneath his usual standard, but then again, remember the “Magic Rainbow Song” (officially known as “The Time of My Life”)? Someone should contact David Cook stat and I want to see David do this song, even if it’s as an impromptu personal YouTube video…
PORTUGAL: “Vida Minha [My Life]” – Filipa Sousa. Portugal decided to return to a previously successful formula: a traditional, almost epic ballad featuring a female vocalist and a chorus of five backing her up. It worked four years ago with “Senhora do Mar” by Vania Fernandes, and it is likely to work again now as it’s a quality piece of work.
UKRAINE: “Be My Guest” – Gaitana. With her half-Congolese heritage (a rarity in lily-white Ukraine; by the way, we are referring to the Republic of Congo here, not the Democratic Republic of Congo that used to be known as Zaire), she singlehandedly created an R&B scene in her nation. She reminds me of a cross between Sofia Vergara and Pussycat Dolls’ founder Robin Antin, but with a mocha complexion. Regarding the song, imagine David Guetta’s hit song “When Love Takes Over” as if being sung by Taylor Dayne, and you get this number. So far, fans are relatively dismissive of this number, even claiming that this might be the first time Ukraine will miss the finals. But I have a feeling she will manage to get through, maybe with a little help from the Balkan Bloc, but also because you can be sure Gaitana’s fierce vocals would never be denied and there is the presence of a stage gimmick (or two).
Mika Newton propelled Ukraine to a surprisingly high fourth place last year with her otherwise just-0kay ballad because of a nice stage gimmick–a sand artist onstage making striking and fleeting images as they are projected on a screen. This year’s gimmick involves a couple of large screens that judging from rehearsals will feature duplicate images of dancers to create the illusion of having more people onstage than the maximum allowable limit of six persons, along with a dancer clad in an outfit rigged with LED lights.
Another interesting note is that being an established artist back in her home country, Gaitana had already performed with two of the fiercest Eurovision divas from her nation, champion Ruslana (from 2004) and runner-up Ani Lorak (from 2008) [Is it coincidence or is it destiny that they competed in this contest four years apart?]. In December 2010, the trio performed a couple of songs together on the TV show True La-La, covering Barry White’s “Never Never Gonna Give You Up” and Annie Lennox’s “Why”. Check out that three-diva summit below.
BULGARIA: ”Love Unlimited” – Sofi Marinova. From one big-voiced diva to another. Though she has a tone that reminds me of the female singer from her country’s most successful Eurovision entry thus far, Elitsa Todorova, she is more of a ferocious vocal powerhouse and she powers through this Bulgarian language techno ditty. This song employs an old-fashioned song gimmick done by some Eurovision entries back in the earlier days, featuring lyrics rendered in other languages–in this case, the phrase “I love you” in Arabic, Azerbaijani, English, French, Greek, Italian, Romani, Serbo-Croatian, Spanish, and Turkish. My only beef with this entry is that with such a catchy propulsive dance ditty, she will be alone in performing this number during the semifinals and possibly finals, and she won’t be doing much dancing.
SLOVENIA: “Vermjamem [I Believe]” – Eva Boto. There is heavy positive buzz amongst Eurovision fans over this dramatic, classically tinged ballad. There will be a visual gimmick as her back-up singers will be wearing bridesmaid dresses and possibly elaborate hats like in the national final. Could this help propel this entry into Slovenia’s best Eurovision finish? It is very possible.
COMING UP: The second half of the second semifinal, plus finalist forecasts.
Honestly, the second half of the first semi-final is a mixed bag with dreadful numbers mixed with solid pop contenders. Let’s proceed with:
ISRAEL: “Time” – Izabo. I love the opening drumbeat of this song. Unfortunately, the rest of this entry went downhill–imagine ABBA’s catchy 1973 ditty “Nina, Pretty Ballerina” rearranged for whoopee cushions or loud farting noises, and you get this song. Yes, this make the song sound dated and suitable for Eurovision 1972, not 2012.
SAN MARINO: “The Social Network Song (Oh Oh – Uh – Oh Oh)” – Valentina Monetta. Yes, this song is co-written by the guy who wrote the winning entry for Germany exactly 30 years ago with “Ein biβchen Frieden“, Ralph Siegel, but despite the attempt to sound relevant, this electro-pop song is just too silly and bad to deserve advancing further. It generated controversy as its original title was “Facebook, Uh, Oh, Oh (A Satirical Song)” which actually violated Eurovision rules (hence modifying the title and some of the lyrics). This country reached a desparate nadir with this entry, I fear, likely to be prevented from occupying the cellar by Montenegro’s entry.
CYPRUS: “La La Love” – Ivi Adamou. Conventional wisdom would have it that Cyprus would field the inferior entry to Greece (though there were exceptions to that especially during the 1980s). But surprisingly, Eurovision fans were buzzing over this catchy techno ditty more than the Greek one. Since Greece is in the same group, it is going to be guaranteed douze (12) points from them and would boost this entry’s chances of advancing into the finals. Now it would depend on how well Ivi keeps on pitch when she performs in order for this entry to rank high in the finals.
DENMARK: “Should’ve Known Better” – Soluna Samay. This mid-tempo pop ditty is, in my opinion, the best crafted pop song amongst this year’s entries. It has strong melody, more-than-decent lyrics, nicely sleek production, and sweet-yet-plaintive vocals by Soluna. It has more than a fighting chance of not only advancing into the finals, but also making the Top 10 in the finals, at the very least.
RUSSIA: “Party for Everybody” – Buranovskiye Babushki. In English the name of this act means “Grannies from Buranovo”. Almost every year, there would be an utterly dreadful entry that would be very successful and place in the Top 10 in this contest–classic example: Lithuania’s 2006 entry, “We Are the Winners”. This entry is likely to take that slot. Just like that notorious Lithuanian entry, this is basically a cheeky techno ditty loaded with the dumbest English lyrics since the notorious “Cheeky Song (Touch My Bum)” by the Cheeky Girls–they just happened to add folk lyrics in the Grannies’ native Udmurt language and some traditional instruments for that “ethnic” flavor. Worse, the Grannies barely even sing the song on-key. Sure, we can excuse them because of their age, but think again–The United Kingdom is fielding 76-year-old Engelbert Humperdinck, who had proven that he can still sing close to his prime even at his current age. I hope the juries and audience come to their senses and judge (and vote) according to musical merit, not novelty value.
HUNGARY: “Sound of Our Hearts” – Compact Disco. I still maintain that last year’s entry, Kati Wolf’s “What About My Dreams”, remains one of the best Eurovision recordings of all time–too bad it was marred by an underwhelming presentation and a pitchy vocal performance that it failed to reach its potential and landed a mediocre 22nd place in the finals. There might be a chance that this entry could make up for its predecessor’s disappointing performance, as it’s a solid, high quality pop song with a sober, serious message (as reflected by its similarly somber music video featuring the same actor playing a rich man and a homeless man), and there are less demands on vocals and production for this entry. It received significantly positive buzz amongst Eurovision fans, but wonder if that will translate to the final outcome?
AUSTRIA: “Woki mit deim Popo [Shake Your Bottom]” – Trackshittaz. The way the rappers pronounced the word “Popo”, it sounded like “poo-poo”, and quality-wise that’s what this song is. But it’s undeniably catchy, and one of the rappers surprisingly hunky with a beefy buffed bod. The language is not standard German but an upper Austrian dialect known as Mühlviertlerisch. Just like Moldovan band Zdob si Zdub* (who made the finals twice in 2005 and 2011, landing in the Top 10 the first time and just missing the Top 10 in its second-go-round), they are likely going to rely on gimmicks to parlay their crappy song into the finals–in this case, three back-up pole dancers who will shake their booties onstage and perform some risque choreography.
* In 2005, they have a grandma drummer onstage just like what was reflected in their song lyrics; in 2011, they wore dunce caps and have a pretty girl riding a unicycle around them.
MOLDOVA: “Lautar” – Pasha Parfeny. Speaking of Moldova, they decided to go old-fashioned with this folky hootenanny sung in English (only the title is in Moldovan, which refers to a traditional Romani musician). It is actually an entertaining enough listen and the stage performance promises to be entertaining that it could sustain its finals streak.
IRELAND: “Waterline” – Jedward. Actually this is a better song than their previous entry last year with “Lipstick”. The only issue is that this song doesn’t seem to provide opportunities for them to create a spectacle like what they did last year. Though I don’t expect these pompadoured twin boys to duplicate their Top 10 Eurovision success, they deserve to at least advance to the finals and have a respectable showing.
Now with the first semifinals accounted for, here’s who I think would advance into the finals:
ICELAND, GREECE, ROMANIA, CYPRUS, DENMARK, RUSSIA, HUNGARY, AUSTRIA, MOLDOVA, IRELAND
BUBBLING UNDER: ALBANIA, FINLAND, SWITZERLAND
COMING UP: The first half of the second semifinal.
